I recently read Romans 9 with a friend. Even accepting that the passage is more about redemptive history and God's purposes for Israel and the Gentiles than individual predestination it is still hard to swallow the God who freely chooses.
However, Romans 9-11 also shows us how Paul responded to this the difficulty of God's strange works of rejecting some. What he exemplifies for us applies to experiences of suffering as much as it does with the specific issue of predestination.
- Be humble and recognise who you are. "who are you, O man, to answer back to God?" Paul asks (Romans 9:20). "Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge?" God asks Job (Job 38:2).
- Be comforted that Christ experienced the worst. It is not in Romans 9-11 but "we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses" (Heb 4:15), we have Christ who suffered physically, emotionally and spiritually on the tree. And he has not left us alone but is present with us by his Spirit.
- Be hopeful because God has good purposes. In Romans 9 he rejected the Jews "in order to" bring in the Gentiles. He brought Job to the end of himself, but then "blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning" (Job 42:12). He saw his Son crucified to raise him again to the highest place. It may be difficult to see, but he works all things together for good (Rom 8:28).
- Be prayerful and cry out to him. God doesn't want passive stoicism in the face of his strange ways, but he wants us to wrestle with him, continually holding him to his promises. So Paul says that his "heart's desire and prayer to God for them is that they may be saved" (Rom 10:1).